Microwave Michelin: Spam Sushi

I’m sure the following scenario sounds familiar to you: it’s 9:30 p.m. on a weekday and you’re getting ready for a study session that will last into the wee hours of the night. After half an hour of work (20 minutes of which were spent on TikTok), an earthshaking growl erupts from your stomach. Despite eating dinner three hours ago, you feel a uniquely ravenous hunger that prompts you to find the closest source of nutrition.

“I deserve a break anyway,” you tell yourself — you really don’t.

Scavenging your room for food, you come up with nothing but an empty box of Shin ramen.

“Fine,” you sigh. “I’ll see what UberEats has to offer me.”

Yet, woe is you — the deadly combination of an exorbitant delivery fee and a one-hour wait time slashes your dietary dreams once again! You shed a single tear as you are left hopeless, heartbroken, and hungry. Dejectedly picking up your pen, you are once again resigned to a night of all work, no reward.

But what if I told you it didn’t have to be this way? What if I told you there was a way to ensure you were never without good food? That, you too, could take the red pill and ascend? What if, instead of looking to outside sources for food, you took matters into your own hands?

“Haha, good one,” the skeptical reader might scoff. “We poor boarding students don’t have access to any conventional cooking appliances except for microwaves. How would we make our own meals, much less make them taste good?”

Many of your peers have been grappling with the same intense questions, and a few of them have cheap dishes to share with you that, despite being cooked in a microwave, are worthy of (at least a few) Michelin stars. This term, we invited Bertha Bailey’s Jonathan Jin ’24 to share his special signature: Microwave Spam Sushi.

“I like it because of its simplicity. It’s super easy to make…[and] it’s a bit on the fattier side, but I think the heavy flavors only enhance the flavor experience. It’s also a bit reminiscent of hotpot since I always eat hotpot with rice and spam. Overall, both the creation and the dish and its rich flavors make it one of my favorite microwave meals,” said Jin.

Without further ado, happy eating, everyone — we’ll see you next term.

Ingredients

• 1 box of Spam
• 1 bowl of instant rice
• 1 packet seaweed
• Cooking oil (optional)

Directions

1. Cut a block of spam into pieces based on how large you want your sushi.
2. Microwave spam on a plate (with cooking oil for extra crispiness)
3. Make your instant rice (with varying amounts of water based on how sticky you want it: the more water, the stickier)
4. Cut squares out of the instant rice that are the same size as your spam pieces.
5. Wrap each piece in seaweed
6. There you have it — some deliciously cheap sushi.

Microwave Rice Krispy Treats

Samantha Older ‘25 Doublebrick

Ingredients

• ½ cup butter
• Mini marshmallows
• Rice Krispies cereal

Directions

1. Put butter and marshmallows in a microwave-safe container.
2. Microwave the container until melted, but remove the container every 30 seconds to stir.
3. Add cereal to your sticky marshmallow cream and mix until well combined.
4. Move your Rice Krispie mixture to a different container and wait for it to cool.
5. Enjoy!